Morts Musings

I saw this piece in the Telegraph last week, and have only just had time to comment on it; The long and short of it is that a group of people decided to take up residence in a big old Paris mansion, but without bothering to go through any of the standard stuff which one generally does when one moves into a new home, you know, things like signing a contract or paying rent; to put it another way, they’re squatting.
So what’s newsworthy about that, you ask? squatting is hardly a new concept. Well, fair question, the thing in this case is that the squatters are actually a group of clean cut, well-educated, professionals, who, at least partly, are protesting about the price of rented accommodation in Paris, and, to their credit, they’ve done a fair amount of maintainence and repairs on the property, which has been uninhabited for about 40 years. Even the mansion’s owner, having met the group, was persuaded that they were a decent bunch who weren’t wrecking her property, although legal complications have meant that moves to evict the group are still on-going.

For all the cross channel rivalry that’s existed between Britain and France, for pretty much a millenium now, I do have to say that, as a nation, the French have a great attitude to protesting and protecting their rights, an attitude which sadly the Normans seemed to leave on the continent, or which, at least, has been well and truly beaten out of the British at some point over the last thousand years.
Still, for all I admire the Gallic attitude to asinine laws and regulations, any Brits planning a holiday in France this year would probably be safer to take a conventional approach to arranging their accommodation, and, for that matter, travel arrangements, I’m not sure that even the French would take kindly to one borrowing an unused car or van. No, even in France car hire is probably still the safest bet for getting around, unless you’re planning on your stay being extended, and “at the pleasure” of the French authorities.

Apparently, the iconic British brand, M&S, has opened a branch in Marbella. Presumably the aim is to be able to provide British ex-pats, & tourists, with all their familiar home comforts, & on the face of it that might not be such a bad basis for opening a store. After all Brits make up about a quarter of all foreign tourists to visit Spain.

However, I really have to wonder about the timing of the move. Ok, it looks like the economic slump may be coming to an end but even so it seems to me like quite a risky move. In the fairness M&S have said that opening the store is a “toe in the water”, to test the Spanish market, but is now really the time for such experiments? On one hand, the recent low prices in the Spanish property market have to be a good reason to make such a move now, you would think it’s certainly got to decrease the start up costs, and if Spanish property does start regaining its value, as some are suggesting is the case, then picking a store up now may even be a shrewd investment!
Still, if M&S’s target audience for the new store is Brits abroad, (it seems like a fair guess) then the timing starts to look a little more questionable to me. Britain’s slow recovery from recession means that many Brits are still going to be watching the pennies and avoiding foreign holidays, a factor likely to be exacerbated by the current poor Pound:Euro exchange rate, & reflected by the 15% drop in British visitors which Spain has experienced over the past year. What makes the move stranger is that this isn’t the first time that M&S have opened stores in Spain, the previous venture ended in the sale of the nine stores when they failed to make a profit. Still, the thinkers at M&S have no doubt considered all of this, and are presumably willing to accept a loss in the short term.

I suppose a big question is whether they’ll extend their recent move to stock non-M&S branded goods to the new store? Are we to be treated to M&S Marbella car hire? lol

So it’s coming up to that time of year again, I know it must be; the infuriating Xmas ads have appeared everywhere, and last week my local high street turned on its Christmas lights, and there was me thinking it was still November.
I’m sorry I know a lot of people love various aspects of the festive season, but really it just doesn’t do it for me, and I think to a large extent my objections are fueled by how commercial it’s all become, and how the marketing monkeys have constructed this idea that you’re abnormal unless you’re spending lots of money on gifts, food & booze.

It’s still over a month to Christmas and the frenzy is already well underway, if it only affacted those who wanted to buy into it I wouldn’t mind at all, but I swear that the population’s stress levels rise noticably during the weeks leading up to the festival. It’s palpable any time you’re out in the street, stressed people running around the shops desperately looking for all those Xmas “essentials” which find their way on to the Christmas shopping list. It seems totally perverse to me, and not at all in the spirit either of a holiday, or of the festival itself- I strongly suspect that JC would be turning in his grave if he could see what’s become of the celebration of his birth!
Even though I wouldn’t label myself as a Christian I still find the way that the marketing men have completely twisted Xmas to serve their purposes to be utterly cynical and distasteful! What’s worse is that they’ve so suceeded in subverting the spirit of the holiday that those who choose not to “buy the hype” get labeled as “scrooges” by those around them. Bah Humbug indeed!

What should be a time to relax, spend some time with those who matter, and maybe, if it is one’s want, to consider matters spiritual, is completely overshadowed by an orgy of spending & stress; No wonder most people need a break by the time it rolls round to December 25th!

The last couple of years I’ve completely opted out of the whole thing, and I have to say they’ve been a couple of the best Christmasses I’ve ever had! Yes, I did get some nice bits and pieces of food & drink in for while the shops were closed, but nothing excessive, and certainly nothing that required the amount of effort which people all over the country seem to spend on preparing the perfect Christmas dinner!
I gave Xmas shopping a miss too, rather than guessing at what my niece and nephew might be into currently, (and possibly for as far in the future as the next 5 minutes,) I decided to give them some cash each. The marketing idiots would have me labelled as “not making an effort”, but actually I look on it as giving the kids the opportunity to buy something they actually want. Yes, it does also save me the pain of running around over-crowded shops trying to find something which they might like, but frankly that just makes it a win-win situation as far as I’m concerned.
Come the day itself I got up when I wanted to, some time around lunch time, and spent most of the day slobbing around in my dressing gown with the house to myself, eating and drinking nice things, as & when I felt like it, & watching whatever TV I wanted to.
Honestly, it was heaven!

This year’s different, I’ve been severely guilt tripped by the folks, and although my immediate reaction to such guilt tripping is to be thoroughly bloody minded, I may actually cave and make the pilgramage to London to catch up with the family; Nothing puts me in a relaxed festive mood more than negotiating London’s public transport network at its busiest time of the year!
Of course that means thinking about what to get various elder family members, & on this I have as little clue as I do when it comes to my niece and nephew. The difference, I suppose, is that with adults you can give them ethical gifts; at worst they’ll be too polite to complain, and best case is that the gift actually makes them feel good, which is probably better than me buying them something I think they might like.
Dunno, will have to have a think, but the charity idea strikes me as a pretty good fall back if I can’t think of anything which would be genuinely useful to them.

It’s strange how a holiday celebrating a man who denounced materialism has been turned into an orgy of shopping, it just feels wrong.

Refreshing to read a review on the Wall Street Journal – Scroogenomics: Why You Shouldn’t Buy Presents for the Holidays,” by a Wharton professor named Joel Waldfogel.

He says the deadweight loss to society from all of this frivolous spending — an “orgy of wealth destruction” as he calls it — is about £10 billion. Imagine if that money was given to charity instead?

“Throughout the year, we shop meticulously for ourselves, looking at scores of items before choosing those that warrant spending our own money. The process at Christmas, by contrast, has givers shooting in the dark about what you like… to make matters worse, we do much of this spending with credit, going into hock using money we don’t yet have to buy things that recipients don’t really want.”

Instead of delving into the ideas in depth, the interviewer seems to focus more on trying to portray Mr. Waldfogel as a scrooge when he has excellent reasons for suggesting that wealth destruction is the result of ill-considered holiday spending. Perhaps the trend towards charity gift cards, and eliminating their non-use fees, isn’t such a bad thing after all. Give to charity this Christmas by sourcing and sending genuine/ ethical charity Christmas cards

Christmas has been whored out as a gift giving orgy for decades and now, with the recession, hopefully we can break the habit.

A lot of economists say that not spending / buying gifts on Christmas hurts the economy etc etc, but ultimately where do most of the presents we buy for loved ones come from? Where does the majority of the money flow to? CHINA.

How about, this year, we start to think about stopping this shopping madness. Take a second look at those useless toys you’re planning on buying and use some of that money towards paying off your credit card. The economy will be stronger for it and there will be less toys in the dustbin come next year.

Money is completely wasted in undesired gifts. In gift giving, you received tremendous benefit – spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physicially. This benefit is specifically derived when you give to someone you love or strong friendship and enjoy the experience of their enjoyment of the gift. That is the benefit.

The benefit of giving charity gifts is just as valuable and absolutely should be done. In fact, it would help to reduce the dependence upon government assistance in many ways.

It’s a sunny day and I’m trapped in an office on a Friday afternoon, thinking about work is far too much effort, and, after a couple of pints at lunchtime, I don’t even have the energy to rant about the joke that is our political system, or the idiots who somehow manage to justify their existences by working in it.

So, instead, I think I’ll post something which may, or may not, be an excuse to post pictures of attractive young women. Sexist? I’d prefer to see it as an exercise in appreciating the female form, after all I am a trained anatomist, so really it’s all perfectly legitimate. *shrug*

Anyway, without further ado, I present you with… The Mort’s Musings guide to choosing swimwear *ahem, cough *

How to Choose Swimwear

If you’re planning on a beach holiday this year, then you’ll probably want to buy some new swimwear.  Here is a summary of the different types of swimwear available together with some hints and tips to help you choose the right item for you.

Types of Swimwear – Swimsuits

A traditional swimsuit: Looks good without being too revealing, a safe choice for any woman

Traditional one-piece swimsuits are still are popular option and you’ll find a wide range of different designs to choose from.

The type of swimsuit that will suit you will depend on your body shape. If you are a classic pear shape (with small shoulders and a wider waist), for example, a swimsuit with a halterneck can help to draw attention to the top half of your body and therefore look more flattering, whereas if you are an “apple” shape (with board shoulders and a smaller waist), a swimsuit with a high neck line can help to draw attention towards your waist, making your figure look more balanced. If you are slim and want to create the effect of having more curves, opt for a swimsuit with cut-out sections or a belt at the waist.

It’s also important to choose a swimsuit in a colour that suits you. If you’re already fairly tanned, a brightly coloured swimsuit will show your tan off effectively, whilst a dark coloured swimsuit will look better on people without a tan. If you are slender, swimsuits with all-over patterns can look great, but if you are looking for a swimsuit that has a slimming effect, choose a plain, darker coloured swimsuit.

Types of Swimwear – Bikinis

The bikini: a perfect choice for the body confident woman

Bikinis have been popular ever since Bridgette Bardot wore one in the 1957 movie “And God Created Woman”, and you can now buy bikinis in many different styles. You can buy bikini sets, but you can also buy separate bikini tops and bikini briefs, so you should be able to find a bikini that suits your body shape perfectly.

You can buy underwired bikini tops for additional support, for example, or padded bikini tops to help you to create more shape. If you want a less revealing and sportier bikini top, you could try a bikini crop top. Bikini briefs also come in a range of styles, including hipster briefs, which look great on women with long legs, and tie briefs, which you can adjust to fit you.

Types of Swimwear – Tankinis

The tankini is a modern addition to swimwear and consists of a short, sleeveless top and bikini bottoms. Tankinis are less revealing than bikinis, so are great for women who aren’t confident about showing off their bodies, and the two-piece design also means that they can be more practical than a swimsuit. As with swimsuits and bikinis, tankinis are available in a range of styles. You can choose from a number of different styles of tankini tops, including halterneck, underwired and sports-style tops, and the range of tankini briefs available includes high leg, low leg, and low rise briefs, together with plain briefs or briefs which feature detail such as ties or rings.

Other Types of Beachwear

Once you have chosen your new swimsuit, bikini or tankini, you might find that you want some other beachwear to go with it. Kaftans or beach dresses, for example, are perfect for covering up with after your swim, and are both practical and stylish. Beach trousers or holiday shorts are great for wearing on your journey to and from the beach.

You can buy swimwear and beachwear from a number of online retailers. Marks and Spencer, for example, sells a great range of swimsuits, bikinis, tankinis, kaftans, beach dresses, shorts and beach trousers, which you can order from the company’s website.

So, there you have it. I hope you enjoyed this guide as much as I enjoyed “researching” it. At some point, if the readership demands it (who am I kidding? heh) I may have to undertake the onerous task of researching a lingerie guide.